Veneration
by Neflanthir
Summary: Oneshot. Wilhelm x Yeshua fic for Shaami's b'day. Pretty random and pointless. For anyone familiar with my other fics, I guess this could be an accompanying piece. Wilhelm's POV. Rating purely for the pairing, no graphic content of any kind, I think...


As the description says, this is a random Wilhelm x Yeshua piece written for Shaami's birthday. I have absolutely no idea what it's about, lol, even though I did write it. Hope it's enjoyed, especially by Shaami. Laters.

* * *

Pale hands wrapped around the slim, tanned waist of his lover as Yeshua invited himself to sit on Wilhelm's lap. The boy was known for his visits by now and Wilhelm knew work was out of the question, whether he liked it or not. When Yeshua wanted him, he had him; Wilhelm would never deny the boy his needs. Yeshua needed him and he knew that, as irritating and badly timed as his interruptions could be at times, Yeshua always came first.

Normally the visits didn't last very long, just long enough for Yeshua to get the reassurance he needed. Despite his kind heart and will to help everyone, he could be very reserved and unconfident. His role in this existence caused him much fear and sadness and thinking about that made him frightened. At that point, he would turn to Wilhelm, needing to be shown that he was wanted and loved, that he wasn't anything bad. As such, no matter what, Wilhelm couldn't ignore him; he was the strong one of the two of them after all.

Gently he brushed his fingers through Yeshua's hair, muttering all the reassurances Yeshua needed to hear as he did. Once Yeshua was relaxed, he would mumble an apology for disturbing him and leave him to his work. It was almost a routine by now, though Wilhelm hoped it never became that bad. True it was a problem with his work, but that wasn't really what mattered to him. Wilhelm never wanted Yeshua to feel that way at all, for it to become a regular occurrence…no he certainly didn't want that to happen, Yeshua deserved much better than that.

Yeshua snuggled closer to his lover, lightly gripping his top. He was crying again this time, something Wilhelm detested. Wasn't it a crime for an angel to cry? Weren't they meant to be happy and at peace? He hated to see his lover like this, but there was nothing he could do about it, certainly he had tried so many different ways of making Yeshua feel less guilty. The only thing he could do was protect his angel, to take care of everything for him and make sure that he never had to fulfil that role.

It was of course possible that one day Yeshua would choose to walk another path, one that humanity felt ready to take, but that was a long time in coming. Yeshua was no where near ready to stand on his own two feet; he needed Wilhelm far too much. Stroking Yeshua's back soothingly, while continuing to tell him the words he needed to hear did the trick, and slowly but surely the crying came to a halt.

"I'm sorry…" Yeshua mumbled, not moving from his position, not that Wilhelm would have let him.

"It's fine love. I'm here when you need me, you know that." Wilhelm replied softly.

"But I'm always a burden to you, I never give anything back."

"That isn't true Yeshua, you make me very happy and you give me purpose. You are the only one who can define me."

"I love you."

"I love you too Yeshua, more than anything. I promise I will always do what's best for you, what you need."

Yeshua hugged Wilhelm tightly, expressing how grateful he was for Wilhelm's words before pulling away. Wilhelm ran his hand down Yeshua's cheek before kissing his forehead gently. Yeshua smiled brightly, his normally ever-present good mood finally returning. Wilhelm allowed himself a small smile as well, to further reassure his lover, knowing he would be left to continue working now.

"I'll make something nice for when you get back home tonight." Yeshua said, smiling sweetly.

"I look forward to it." Wilhelm replied, watching as Yeshua left.

Once he was alone again, Wilhelm sighed softly, turning back to his work. He really disliked those situations, mainly because he had no control over them, he couldn't stop them from occurring. He was always left feeling distract after them, making it difficult for him to catch up on things, he usually ended up even further behind schedule.

I worry too much about him I suppose. Yeshua doesn't need me fussing over him as much as I do. No, that isn't quite true, the problem is that I have to repeatedly mull over everything because I want to find a way around it, even though I know I can't. I'm not particularly good at accepting that something is beyond my influence or control. This is especially prominent in regards to someone or something I care for, since I don't easily get attached.

I wonder what bothers me more, the fact that Yeshua is hurting, or the fact that I'm powerless. As cold as it sounds, I think it must be the latter. I don't like Yeshua hurting, and it does hurt me to know that he is, but it is my inability to resolve the situation permanently that preoccupies me to such extents. Order and control are required for me to exist in the manner I am meant to, a lack of such disturbs me no end. Not that I would ever admit that of course.

That doesn't mean I don't love him or care for him, I really do. I try the very best I can for him, to make him as happy as possible. I'm not the best when it comes to emotions, or at least within myself, but I give him everything I can, and I don't mean materialistically. Some things are beyond me and I admit that, emotions are something that have never played a huge role within me, I'm just not that way inclined. Analysis from a distance to understand without being directly involved, that is something I am far better with. All I can ever do is my best, and I do give it my all for him, even if that comes off pale in comparison to him. We both know how different we are, to humanity and to each other, we are opposites.

Behaving in a 'normal' manner socialistically speaking isn't necessarily easy for either of us, for me simply because I have no care for such, while I may be lacking in certain areas certainly for such triviality I can pretend well enough; for Yeshua, because he hates to stand out, he's the sort of person that stands on the edge of a group and says nothing. While he likes to be around others and is wonderful for being supportive, he's afraid to let anyone close, less they find out his secrets.

His fears I cannot see ever leaving him, so long that role remains his, but perhaps in time they can lessen somewhat. I know if he had less time stuck alone he would have less time to think about all of that, and he desperately wants to interact and to have people he can call friends. One day perhaps, he will find his feet and move forward to walk the path he longs to, that path may lead him from me of course, but if it what is best for him, then I have no intention of preventing such.

Dearest Yeshua, if only you weren't so sensitive to everything, maybe then you could be happier. You wouldn't feel so much guilt and take so much on yourself. Try as I might, I know there is nothing I can do about that, you are the only one who can change yourself, and only when you're ready to do so, if ever you will be.

Surprisingly I've managed to get through my work quite well, despite my internal musings. There isn't too much longer that I have to stay here and as I'm almost done, I'll be able to leave on time for a change. Won't that be a pleasant surprise for him? It's a shame that I'm so completely unsociable, since it means I can't help him socialise. Still, I can make sure that he enjoys tonight and doesn't harbour any feelings of guilt, that's something at least. Yeshua is meant to be happy, something so bright is meant to shine for all to see. Maybe some day…

Right, enough of that now. I've spent far too long on such pointless things; such thoughts help nothing and change nothing. It's time to finish up and leave, Yeshua will be waiting for me. Comforting him and keeping his thoughts on pleasanter things is all that I can do for him, and as such, that is all I should be considering. When he needs me, I'm there for him, it is always that simple.

--

Wilhelm entered the apartment he shared with Yeshua, not really surprised by the rich food aromas that filled the air. Yeshua was always sure to prepare something special for Wilhelm's return after one of his visits, though usually he was kept waiting as Wilhelm had to work late to catch up. This was probably the first time he had ever arrived back before Yeshua was finished what he was doing.

"You're home on time…everything went well at work?" Yeshua asked softly as he entered the hall.

"Yes, for once I actually got everything done on time." Wilhelm replied casually, taking the time to study his lover.

Yeshua smiled warmly. "That's good. Why don't you go and freshen up? I won't be finished for a while yet."

"Can I convince you to join me?" Wilhelm asked playfully, already knowing the answer was no.

Yeshua laughed, quickly giving Wilhelm a chaste kiss on his cheek before returning to the kitchen, replying as he went. "You know I have to take care of the food."

Wilhelm smiled softly and headed for the bathroom to take his lover's advice. Yeshua always tried so hard, but he still relied on Wilhelm so much. These few occurrences always started of badly, but they always ended well, even more so when Yeshua was willing to play along, rather than being serious.

Despite Wilhelm's reputation for being stoic, he thoroughly enjoyed sarcastic banter. To be able to say almost anything without having to worry about being taken offensively was a rare treat his work did not allow for. Usually Yeshua didn't either, being so very sensitive; meaning Wilhelm always had to watch what he said.

I have so much more to consider than everyone else, not just a few decades, or a century at the very most, I have to plan ahead and consider events thousands of years into the future. Everything I do now will effect what is to occur in that time, and having people close to me, knowing certain things about me, that would certainly work against me.

'Well, yes, my great, great, great, great, great grandfather knew him and he hasn't changed a bit since then.' 'Really? In that case we'd better investigate and find out why.' No, I really don't need any added problems. Besides, I shall need to manipulate things from behind the scenes, under such circumstances, doing such would be practically if not impossible.

Very little about this shall be easy no doubt, but I do what I must, for Yeshua and for humanity. Sometimes, I admit, I find myself wondering if humans are really worth all this effort; though that being said, even if I didn't really think they were, Yeshua does, and that is reason enough. I would do anything for him, for his will, even if that meant giving him up or lying to him. His will for them comes before his love for me, though I think that is only because he knows that they need him far more than I do, rather than meaning that I'm less important to him than them.

--

As always, the meal was wonderful and well presented. Yeshua really can be quite the perfectionist at times, though I know I'm far worse than he is when it comes to such things. Now that eating is out of the way, we can get down to more interesting things. Of course, what we do is up to Yeshua, since this is about cheering him up, even if he thinks it's to apologise. He really does worry about everything far too much.

That is yet another thing I am unfortunately quite aware that I can do nothing about. We really are complete opposites in most regards, yet we still fit together so well, though I suppose not being tied down by their ways and beliefs helps with that. Otherwise I expect there would be much fighting and problems in general, rather than the peace and harmony we are both used to.

"I have no idea what's possessed me to ask this, but can we watch a horror film?" Yeshua asks quietly.

Wilhelm can't help but look at him oddly before he answers; knowing Yeshua doesn't like scary or violent movies. "If you're really sure that's what you want to do."

How very unusual, why would he want to do something he knows he doesn't like? I don't really see the problem with them myself; they are as bland to watch as everything else. Television and movies never really hold any interest for me; I know exactly what they have in mind from the beginning. I suppose the same is said for life as well, only I shape that, while the media is designed by someone else. Regardless, I shall have to at least try to seem interested.

Hm, it seems as though some thought may have actually gone into this one, and the humour is dry, perhaps it won't be too bad after all. Well, for me at least, I can't see that Yeshua will enjoy it. I expect it's the gore that bothers him with these things, despite the fact that it's fake. Yeshua will fight if and when he has to, but he doesn't like to see anyone hurt, so I don't expect seeing someone eviscerated or something along those lines would be something he would approve of or enjoy.

"Not nice…" Yeshua whimpered while clinging tightly to Wilhelm's arm while burying his face in Wilhelm's shoulder.

Wilhelm smirked, pulling Yeshua onto his lap while wrapping one arm round his waist and stroking his hair with the other. "It isn't meant to be nice Yeshua, you know that."

"Mm. This is though. Maybe you could distract me on all the nasty bits?"

"That would be most of the film."

"Really? Oh, that's such a shame…"

Wilhelm shrugged his smirk widening. "As you please love."

The next hour was generally spent 'distracting' Yeshua from the events playing out on the screen. The sound was enough to explain what was going on, if either of them really wanted to pay it any heed. By the time the film had come to an end, they had both decided one thing, horror films weren't nearly as bad as they first thought.


End file.
